kairos
by calliroe
Summary: and, for the first time in years, she doesn't feel happy at the thought of protecting her country, because her heart is already brimming with happiness at the sight of Mars' tender smile {mars x fana}


**warning:** spoilers from chapter 92. you have been warned!

 **kairos**

 _{{ right or opportune moment }}_

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 **F** ana is seven when the new kid arrives at the facility. At first, it doesn't really bother her. He's short and scrawny, with a bizzarre mane of dark pink spiky hair and that kind of adorable sulky face you wankt to pinch until you manage to coerce a smile.

Nothing more than a filthy orphan, like her, like then, a magical human being to be exploited.

A pity, she thinks, as spirals of flames twirl and whirl in her palms, shedding a soft and warm light on her flushed cheeks.

She later finds out that his name is Mars ー Mars, a cute name, she thinks, yet she doesn't feel like talking to him and he looks like a lone wolf. The other kids are still giddy, like puppies with a new toy, but she figures that their excitement will soon die down.

Or at least she hopes so.

And in the meantime, she keeps training and exercising. She holds no interest in the other kids anymore. She's Fana and at the same time she isn't ー she's but a soldier and she's ready to fight (and to die) for the glory of her kingdom.

...

 **M** ars is eight when he first notices the confident girl with bushy pink hair and eyes teeming with repressed determination. Even though she's as thin as a rail, she exudes a candid grace as she superbly dances, cocooned in the same flames she has created, elegant as a ballerina, brutal as a warrior.

Fana ー that's how the other kids call her, and Mars is still mesmerised by how such a little and dainty body can contain so much energy and vitality. He feels foolish at first. Mars, the slum rat, one of the most talented kids in the facility, admiring that reserved and stubborn girl.

And maybe it is the same foolishness that goads him into approaching her. He doesn't feel embarrassed or awkward as he rigidly grips her ー still sizzling, surprisingly not charred ー hand and places a rough, reddish gem on her palm.

"Hi." he says simply, taking a cautious step back as she frowns at the small present he has created just for her.

"Whatー" she mouths as she eyes him warily, the gem now clenched in her fist. Her half-lidded eyes drink in the beauty of the small stone, from the pretty glint of orange in the middle to the uneven and shiny texture.

"It's a gem. For you."

"Thanks, Captain Obvious."

"Well, it's a fire opal" he shrugs, not really sure about how to reply. Girls have always been a mystery for him "It's quite rare. I think it really suits you, Fana."

"Fire opal." she repeats distractedly, as if she's tasting the syllables rolling on her tongue "It's really pretty."

"Definitely not prettier than you." he blurts out as Fana awkwardly fidgets with the opal, a feeble smile curling on her mouth.

"T-thanks."

"You're welcome!" he chimes, as the first real smile in his life finally settles on his lips.

...

 **F** ana is nine when she first falls in love. It starts slowly, with small, insignificant things like the stifled way-too-girlish giggle that threatens to escape her lips every time she sees him or the traitorous hue assumed by her cheeks every time she caught a glimpse of Mars' smile. She likes it, when he smiles ー his usually focused, straight face lights up every time that that mischievous grin blooms on his mouth. Not to mention that he has a dimple. A really cute dimple.

Fana has never had a secret but now she can feel it, hidden inside her chest, buried into her heart, like stubborn, smouldering embers that refuse to dissolve in tendrils of smoke and shimmers of light. If only it were so simple, she thinks, as her fingertips meet the mild warmth of the fire opal. A long sigh escapes her lips.

Love. A strong feeling of affection.

It's only an abstract concept in Fana's mind, one that smells like vanilla and strawberries. No one has ever explained it to her, but it feels like a slow-burning, intoxicating flame searing her soul, devouring her chest. Of course, she is very skilled at manipulating fire, but this very tenacious one doesn't seem to want to die down.

And, for the first time in years, Fana doesn't feel happy at the thought of protecting her country, because her heart is already brimming with happiness at the sight of Mars' tender smile.

...

 **M** ars is ten when he starts to question the Diamond Kingdom. The "how"s and "why"s start to suddenly pop up in his mind even if he's way too young to understand how politics and diplomacy work.

Why do they have to stay in that seedy facility? What are they being trained for? How will they serve the Kingdom? Is the training really necessary?

All that secrecy bothers him and it's been so long since he tasted homemade cookies and the affection of a real family, felt the cold winter breeze tickle his cheeks. When he turns and thrashes in his bed at night, hands pressed against his ears to block the echoes of his thoughts, he can't help fantasising about the freedom that awaits him and Fana out of those four walls. He has come up with a whole lot of plans to flee the facility, but has always feared talking them over with Fana.

He has to hurry, he thinks, as iridescent crystals blossom into his hands, and he feels his soul slowly being drained away by the horror of that place.

...

 **F** ana is eleven when she dreams of the real world, the smell of 'outside' still clinging to her nostrils as she wakes up, sweaty and tired in her cot, tendrils of sleep still wrapped around her body.

"Do you know what the 'outside' world is like?" she gingerly sidles next to him during breakfast, their elbows discreetly touching as she whispers.

"I don't remember much. Do you?" Mars smiles apologetically and she cannot help noticing that small dimple.

"Me neither, but I still miss it. I had a dream last night. Do you think we'll ever see it again?" she bites her lower lip with a pleading glance, her hands dug into her pockets.

"Of course we will!" he exclaims, clapping his hands with a huge, silly grin "And then, when our training is over, we'll explore it together!"

"When our training is over." she nods, lazily dangling her legs as she lowered her gaze.

"Yeah, after the last test." he chirps, gripping heri warm hand with an unwavering and faithful smile.

After the last test.

...

 **M** ars is twelve when he kills Fana.

 _It wasn't me._

There's blood on his hands ー viscous, sticky, uncomfortably warm ー trickles of vermilion on his fingers, under his nails, on his face.

Someone is screaming ー it's so far away that he doesn't understand, he can't understand.

 _It wasn't me._

His eyes focus on the scene without really seeing it, trying to make sense out of Fana's mangled body, her blood, her smile, like someone trying to solve a puzzle that lacks some pieces. White walls. Sizzling flames coating his body. Silence.

And Fana ー Fana is dying.

 _It wasn't me._

And he watches her, as the pinkish hue is drained from her cheeks and her breath becomes ragged, irregular, the flicker of hope in her turquoise eyes slowly dimming. And he keeps screaming, screaming, screaming, until his throat is sore and until ー until he has no more tears to shed.

 _It wasn't me._

"Explore the 'outside' world for the both of us, Mars." she whispers, as Mars slowly comes to the realisation of what he has done.

 _It was me._

 _..._

 **F** ana is thirteen when Licht finds her, the shadow of what she once was, a guinea pig for the Diamond Kingdom's scientists. The same Kingdom she has pledged to protect, the same people she had respected and loved, that had now left a warped oblivion inside her, just an empty space in the wake of what once was.

They have broken her and reshaped her again, lining the tiles to create not a human, but a beautiful, expendable tool.

She's merely a bony thirteen-year-old girl, beaten and pale, cowering and shivering in a cold corner of her cell when the beautiful man approaches her, that candid, oh-so-innocent smile on his lips as he kneels down before her.

Fana is shaking, biting her lip as his delicate fingers trace her cheek, brushing away the filthy strands of hair that frame her gaunt face.

"You've suffered so much." he purrs, a reassuring, almost blissful expression that lights his face up "But now it's over. Come. I won't harm you."

Fana shakes her head, tears streaking her skin as she huddle up closer to the wall.

"Please. Please, make them stop."

"It's over now." his voice is incredibly soothing, sweet as honey "It's over. What's your name, girl?"

"F-fana." her voice is a whisper and Licht smiles to himself, feeling the powerful surge of mana the girl exudes. The girl loved by the mana.

"Fana, you are safe now. We are people like you, people who have suffered and who have faced oppression. Our goal is to build a better world." he says softly, his hand reaching for her as he is cocooned in almost divine light "You can join us."

And, as she grips Licht's hand, Fana the Hateful is finally born.

...

 **M** ars is fourteen when he undergoes the operation, crystals embedded in his body and a scorching pain every time he tries to lift his head for the first few weeks. It's brutal, immoral, morbid, cruel, even, but it's how his country operates and he has become a puppet in the hands of the scientists. He receives his grimoire weeks later, when the training starts again. It's an ugly thing, that book, just few pages sewn together and a dirty, asymmetrical cover, but Kruger will surely teach him how to use it. Nothing to call home about (not that he can, of course), but at least, he is alive, even though his memories are mangled. Memories...

His grimoire reminds him of someone, someone he knows he shouldn't have forgotten, but can by no means remember.

...

 **F** ana is fifteen when she first meets Salamander, one of the Four Major Elementals, and for the first time in years, she feels a deeper connection with the small spirit. Sure, it cannot talk nor understand her words, but she enjoys its warmth when they huddle one next to each other at night, in her room in the headquarters of the White Night Eye.

Salamander cannot quell her loneliness, but at least he cannot tell anyone about how she cries herself to sleep and how she wallows in her misery.

...

 **M** ars is sixteen when he has finally mastered his powers. Fire and crystal, the perfect combo of offence and defence ー heck, he can even cure his wounds with his flames. He's now a full fledged soldier, he has carried out his task and he's now free to serve the Diamond Kingdom for good.

He looks at his pale face in the mirror, crystals in his chest, determination in his eyes, and he thinks he has changed, his powers have broken him hand shaped him, like a shimmering mosaic of crystal and fire. Like a fire opal.

...

 **F** ana is seventeen when her skin brushes the fire opal again, the stone is lukewarm against her slender fingers, like intangible tendrils of smoke trying to form an image in her hazy memory.

"Fire opal." she whispers, absent-minded, as she tries to remember.

She knows that that gem holds some special meaning, but, even though the answer is on the tip of her tongue, she still can't find the answers she needs.

It happened long ago, to a different girl, in a different place. And Fana is not that person anymore.

Now, everything is hatred.

...

 **M** ars is eighteen when he joins the army to follow Radols. The goal he has dedicated his life to accomplish has finally been reached, but there's still some sort of emptiness inside his chest.

It's not how he imagined it, nothing chivalrous nor inspiring, just a string of justified heinous crimes and murders in the name of some abstract God called 'country'.

Now his world is the battlefield and his faith the Kingdom that he turned him into a monster.

...

 **T** hey are both nineteen when, for a bittersweet twist of fate, they face each other again on the battlefield, friends in the past but enemies right now. Both soldiers, a marriage of crystal and fire.

However, this time, Mars is sure about one thing.

He won't let Fana die again.

* * *

 **a/n** ー alright, here we go again: new fandom, new impossibly angst-y and mawkish pairing, ikr. i'm not exactly into shipping, but once i read about these two i thought it was the freaking saddest thing i've aver read, like romeo and juliet but with a religious sect of fanatics and a whole kingdom of douchebags as the two sides. really, it's sad, having to kill the person you love and then having to forGET ABOUT THEM. the angst is real here. anyhow, i thought i could offer some sort of 'timeline' ー and increasing this tiny fandom in the process (we can do it!) ー for fana and mars. i based the drabbles on canon information, but take everything with a grain of salt, since they have both been brainwashed and we don't really know much about the white night eye (and licht). oh, and the fire opal really exists, i just put it in the story because i thought it was quite fitting (yup, i know it's technically not a crystal, but whatever).

anyhow, thanks to anyone who'll read this thing!


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